How to Use “Mirroring” in Interviews to Build Instant Rapport
Part 3 of 10 | Inspired by Never Split the Difference by Chris Voss
Published by Open to Work Now
Interviews can feel formal, stiff, or even one-sided—especially if you’re nervous or second-guessing your worth. But what if there was a simple, natural way to build trust in real time, without needing the perfect answer?
That’s where mirroring comes in.
In Never Split the Difference, Chris Voss calls mirroring “the closest thing to a Jedi mind trick.” It’s subtle, it’s easy, and it’s incredibly effective for job seekers trying to build connection and calm their nerves.
Let’s break down how you can use mirroring to turn your next interview from an interrogation into a conversation.
What Is Mirroring?
Mirroring is repeating the last 2–4 words (or a key phrase) the other person just said. That’s it.
It sounds too simple to be powerful—but it works because it:
Signals that you’re listening
Encourages the other person to keep talking
Builds subconscious rapport and connection
And the best part? It works even if you’re nervous. You don’t have to come up with something clever—just stay present.
How to Use Mirroring in an Interview
Let’s say the interviewer says:
“This role involves a lot of cross-functional collaboration.”
You can respond:
“Cross-functional collaboration?”
[Pause, with curiosity]
They’ll often elaborate, giving you more insight to respond with a tailored example.
It’s a way to say: “I’m listening. I’m interested. Tell me more.”
When to Mirror in a Job Interview
1. When you don’t know what to say (yet):
Mirroring buys you time and helps you stay calm.
2. When you want more detail:
Get behind generic statements like “fast-paced” or “strong communicator” by asking the interviewer to unpack what those terms mean in their world.
3. When you want to connect more deeply:
Mirroring builds trust, especially when used with tone, pacing, and curiosity. It shows you’re not rushing to respond—you’re engaging.
Bonus Tip: Combine Mirroring with Tactical Empathy
Try combining mirroring with labels (another Voss tactic) for maximum impact.
Example:
Interviewer: “We’re looking for someone who can jump in with very little direction.”
You: “Very little direction?” [mirror]
Then: “It sounds like autonomy is really important on this team.” [label]
Now you're not just answering questions—you're building a two-way conversation grounded in understanding.
Real-Life Interview Script Using Mirroring
Q: “Why did you leave your last job?”
You could respond with:
“Why I left my last job?” [mirror]
[Pause. Let them clarify if needed, or repeat the question to show thoughtfulness. Then continue.]
“I made the decision after realizing I needed a different kind of challenge—one more aligned with where I want to grow long-term.”
It softens the question, gives you space to breathe, and shows presence.
Final Thought: Presence > Perfection
Job seekers often feel pressure to perform in interviews. But the truth is: people hire people they connect with. Mirroring helps you slow down, connect, and lead with curiosity—not nerves.
You don’t need to say the perfect thing. You just need to listen well enough to respond with intention—and mirroring helps you do that.
Next Up: The Art of the Pause—Using Silence in Offer Negotiations
Part 4 in our Never Split the Difference for Job Seekers series.
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